88. The Healing Power of Meditation: 5 Ways Meditation Supports Your Recovery from Porn Addiction

In this episode of 'Unhooked', host Jeremy Lipkowitz explores the critical role of meditation in recovering from porn addiction. He outlines five key benefits that meditation provides: developing mindfulness, strengthening self-control, cultivating emotional resilience, restoring balance to neural networks and dopamine systems, and connecting to deeper values and purpose. Jeremy also discusses the launch of the Unhooked Academy group coaching program, which offers a discounted rate for a limited time. The episode emphasizes the various forms of meditation, particularly mindfulness meditation, and how they overlap and support each other in the path to sustainable recovery.

00:00 Introduction to Unhooked

00:22 Unhooked Academy Group Coaching Program

01:18 The Importance of Meditation in Recovery

02:40 Understanding Meditation

03:55 Five Ways Meditation Supports Recovery

04:00 Developing Mindfulness and Present Moment Awareness

06:17 Strengthening Self-Control

08:07 Cultivating Emotional Resilience

09:52 Restoring Neural Balance

12:22 Connecting to Deeper Values and Purpose

14:45 Conclusion and Final Thoughts

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ABOUT JEREMY LIPKOWITZ

Jeremy overcame addiction, shame, self-judgement, and depression in his early twenties with the help of mindfulness meditation. Mindfulness not only helped him let go of destructive behaviors, it also allowed him to connect with deeper meaning and purpose in his life.

For the past 10 years Jeremy has been teaching mindfulness and emotional intelligence practices at universities, recovery centers, and companies throughout Asia and the US. He holds a Bachelors and Master’s degree in Genetics and Genomics, and spent several years at Duke University working towards a PhD in Genetics & Systems Biology before he turned full-time to teaching mindfulness.

Jeremy is also an ICF certified Executive Coach. As a former scientist and academic, Jeremy has a great passion for bringing his EI based coaching skills into the corporate and professional world. He realizes how powerful & transformative these practices can be for skeptics and senior-level managers. He is known for his calm and grounded demeanor, his expertise in habits and high-performance, and his compassionate approach to transformation.

Transcript

 

You're listening to unhooked. On today's episode. Uh, five ways that meditation supports your recovery from porn addiction.  So if you want to stop being a slave to lust. This is the episode for you.  So stay tuned.



So welcome ladies and gentlemen, to another episode of unhooked. I'm your host, Jeremy liquids. And today, before we dive into the content, just another announcement that the unhooked academy group coaching program is now live. Now accepting applications into the group. So, if you've been wanting to get support in your recovery journey, if you've been looking for a group for a roadmap for recovery and an accountability support structure, this is what the unhooked academy group coaching program is all about. Right now, there is a limited time offer a discount of over $800. So if you sign up soon, you can still get access to that offer. 

So if you're interested, go to unhooked academy.com or look for the link in the show notes. Through that site, you can sign up for a free discovery call. To chat with me about whether or not the program is a good fit for you. 

And now onto today's show.  

So welcome everyone back to the show. 

 

This episode is all about the ways in which meditation. Is not only important, but in some ways it's critical or essential for recovery. I don't think I've ever met a single person who has fully recovered from porn addiction without some form of meditation practice or mindfulness practice. So in the episode today, I'm going to talk about the ways that meditation is essential for long-term sustainable recovery.  And this is not just for those of you out there who are listening. This episode today is also for myself because.  It's not always easy to stick to a daily mindfulness practice. 

There have been times throughout my life where I have slipped off my habit. Slipped off my routine. And so I find it helpful from time to time to remind myself. Why this practice is so important for recovery. To reflect on the reasons why meditation is essential in this practice of not just recovery, but in living a good fulfilling, happy life.  So meditation, as I will talk about can really play a pivotal role in supporting you on your journey. And in my own experience, it's probably the single most important factor in my recovery. 

So first to understand meditation is an umbrella term. It's similar to the word medicine. 

There are many kinds of medicine. So when you say medicine, it can mean many different things. There are different kinds of medicine that will address different underlying issues. The same is true for meditation. Meditation is an umbrella term. That means many different things. There are many kinds and flavors of meditation and they actually treat different things and they cultivate different things. But what meditation means it's any kind of. Intentional practice, intentional exercise. Used to cultivate. A mental quality.  So, for example, some of the qualities we might be cultivating and meditation are things like concentration or focus. It might also be cultivating something like awareness. It can also be cultivating the mental qualities of self compassion or compassion for others. You can also be cultivating patients. 

So any kind of activity or exercise that's intentionally done to cultivate a mental quality or a mental trait. This can be considered a meditation. 

 

So without further ado. These are the five ways that meditation supports your recovery.  The first is that meditation helps you develop mindfulness or present moment awareness. So porn addiction often thrives on compulsive behaviors or autopilot responses. And it's these autopilot responses that are particularly damaging because they account for a huge proportion of our life and our, of our actions. 

So there's this one quote I recently saw and I really loved, uh, it comes from the book, the compound effect by Darren Hardy. And he said this.  Your biggest challenge isn't that you've been intentionally making bad choices. Your biggest challenge is that you've been sleepwalking through your choices. Half the time. 

You're not even aware you're making them.  So one of the fundamental outcomes of meditation is the cultivation of this quality of mindfulness or present moment awareness. So a nonjudgmental awareness of the present moment. Through these meditation practices, you can become more aware of what's actually happening in your life of your thoughts, your feelings. Your sensations.  And this can help you disengage from those automatic autopilot responses such as seeking out porn. Seeking out numbing agents or distractions. 

So this can help you break that cycle of addiction when it's on autopilot.  So instead of sleepwalking through choices, you become more awake to your life. More able to intentionally choose how you want to live. 

This is also emphasized in that quote that I often talk about. Coming from the work of Victor Frankl. He says between stimulus and response, there is a space and in that space is your power to choose your response. And in your response lies your growth and your freedom.  So again, noticing that when we are asleep, walking through our life, when we're not aware of what's happening, We're just on autopilot and that's when we tend to engage in these unhealthy habits. So by noticing.  The moment before we act out, this is the first step in recovery. 

Bringing more awareness. To those autopilot behaviors.  

The second benefit of meditation is that it strengthens our self-control. So meditation can enhance our self-control our discipline.  Our willpower, you. These are important qualities necessary for overcoming addiction. We do often talk about in recovery, how willpower is not enough, and this is important to understand.  And while this is true, that willpower is not enough. 

We do still need it. And it is a muscle that we can grow through intentional practice.  So as you deepen your meditation practice. You become more skilled at observing your thoughts and emotions. Without being carried away by them. So, for example, when you sit in meditation, You can, you might notice an itch arising, or you might notice some restlessness, some desire to get up and move. And you can learn how to observe those urges without acting on them.  So this enables you to recognize your cravings and your urges without giving into them. 

This is the muscle that we're building. This self-control willpower discipline. This is one of the essential things that we grow in meditation.  So one of the most common phrases that I hear from people wanting to break free is that they don't want to be a slave to their lust. Or a slave to their desire. And this is what gives you the power to break those chains. You know, developing that quality of self-control you have an urge to do something. To reach for your phone to reach for the cookies, to do whatever. And you have that ability to slow down. And resist that temptation. So that is the second benefit of meditation strengthening. 

Self-control.  The third benefit is cultivating emotional resilience. So porn addiction and really any kind of addiction, often masks some underlying emotional pain or emotional turmoil.  So often the addiction is the attempt to run away from the pain. Whether it's boredom or loneliness or anxiety or overwhelm. I've talked about this quote before from Gabo, Moto, who said. Addiction. 

Isn't the problem. The addiction is the attempt to solve the problem.  So if you want real recovery, You have to learn how to work more skillfully. With underlying emotional distress or underlying emotional problems. With unpleasant experiences.  And meditation provides a safe space for people to explore and process their emotions, to learn how to be with painful emotions without running away from them. 

This is the quality of equanimity that we can grow. So learning how to be with what's difficult. Whether it's boredom or restlessness or desire and learning how to sit with that without running away. This is fundamental to addiction and recovery.  

So through meditation. You can also learn how to cultivate qualities like compassion. Self acceptance and forgiveness. And these also help with emotional resilience. So when you're having some strong, difficult emotion, If you can have some self-compassion in those moments, it's much easier to deal with what's coming up.  So these are some of the ways that meditation helps with emotional resilience.  Benefit number four. 

The fourth way that meditation supports us in our recovery is that it actually restore some balance to our neural networks, into our dopamine system.  So when you over consume porn or any other kind of hyper stimulus, It can disrupt the brain's reward systems and it leads to a dysregulated, cognitive functioning and lowered sense of wellbeing because we're overstimulated or hyper-stimulated.  Meditation on the other end has been shown to counteract these imbalances. 

It promotes neuroplasticity and it fosters healthier neural connections and a healthier dopamine reward system. And this is particularly true in what's called the default mode network of the brain. So it helps us reset. Our default mode network.  You can think of the default mode network as the neural pathway. 

That's active. By default when nothing in particular is happening, just the default neural pathway of the brain.  And when we are hooked on porn and hooked on, you know, whatever kind of hyper stimulus.  Our default mode network is not a very pleasant place. It's a state of constant craving and suffering and all of this. 

And so when we unhook and when we practice meditation, we can reset this default mode network of the brain.  So when it comes to dopamine, when we are hooked on porn, we become hooked on that hyper stimulus. And this makes it hard to take joy in the little things in life. To have contentment for normal experiences. So by practicing meditation, we start to restore that balance. And it gives us the ability to find deeper contentment in the midst of our day-to-day life. So we can learn how to take joy in drinking a cup of tea. Or in what we might think of as a normal sexual experience. Rather than needing every experience to be on hyperdrive, you know, some extreme version. Like flaming hot Cheetos or donuts covered in sugar or some. You know, extreme sexual encounter. We can start to be grateful and have contentment. With more mundane, daily experiences.  So that is the fourth benefit. 

Is it? Resets our reward system resets our dopamine system. We can start to take joy in the little moments of life.  The fifth benefit. And this is maybe the most important is that through meditation, we can connect to deeper values and to purpose.  So often when people are struggling with porn addiction. They feel disconnected from their true selves and from their purpose. So one of my favorite quotes again comes from the work that Viktor Frankl. 

He says, when a person can't find a deep sense of meaning, they distract themselves with pleasure.  So when we're disconnected from that sense of purpose, We use pleasure to distract ourselves. 

 So there was this survey done by men's health magazine and they found that the area that most men thought would improve if they were able to quit porn. Was there connection to spirituality.  So most men have this understanding that if they can quit porn, The area of their life that's going to improve the most is actually their connection to a spiritual life.  Now that is, you know, it's both disheartening and at the same time also uplifting because it, it gives us that promise that if you can break free from this habit, there's so much promise on the other side. You know, point is such a huge barrier to some of these. Deeper questions in life because it sucks away at your energy. Your power, your connection to.  Whatever is beyond that small sense of self.  So meditation on the other hand, It actually provides the space for that introspection and self-reflection and connection to what's important. You actually have space to explore some of your deepest aspirations. And connect with what's important.  And this alone, you know, just connecting. To your purpose can help combat the allure of pornography.  You know, as a substitute for genuine connection and fulfillment, instead of reaching out to porn, you can actually feel fulfilled because you're connected to your purpose.  



So one of the best things you can do to unhook from that pleasure trap is to find time to connect with your values, to connect with some philosophy of life. 

It doesn't have to be religion. It can just be. An ethos, you know, an ethical framework for how to live a good life. Or some sense of purpose.  So those are some of the main reasons that meditation plays a role. In supporting your recovery. You know, again at its core addiction is a dysregulated mind, and meditation is a way to train and cultivate the mind.  So, as I said before, I've seen very few people have long-term sustainable recovery without some form of intentional mindfulness practice or meditation practice. . 

So just remember recovery is possible. And meditation can be a very powerful ally for you on this path of healing and self discovery.  So that's it for today, folks. I hope you enjoyed this episode on meditation. As a reminder right now, the unhooked academy program is live and this includes access to my online training programs. Including my 14 day mindfulness program called mindfulness made easy and also the unhooked academy program.  So if you sign up this week, you're eligible to get $800 off the program price. So definitely check out the resources in the show notes. 

If you're interested.  That's it for today, signing off from Amsterdam, we will catch you on the next episode.